I look gross

Holiday dieting

As the holidays are coming up, last day of school tomorrow to be honest, I thought I should set some goals for the next two weeks. I want to at least weigh 39-40 by the end of these two weeks. I currently weigh 48.2 and feel this is the only thing really keeping me "here" if you know what I mean. So I can either have the choice cut down on food or exercise constantly, why do I have the feeling I'll be doing both?    

Quotes to get you through the day

Every calorie you eat equals another step towards destruction

Do not think of today's failures, but of the success that may come tomorrow. You have set yourself a difficult task, but you will succeed if you preservere and you will find a joy in overcomming obstacles.

Don't hate, lose weight!

Stay thin and you'll always win

Eat less, weigh less, fail less, feel less

Eating is for the weak. Starve for self-control; self-control makes you strong

What nourishes me destroys me

Thin people look good in any kind of clothes

Only I can let myself fail

People who eat are selfish and unrealistic

Don't you want to be remembered as the beautiful, thin one?

Don't let today's weakness ruin tomorrow's dream. The real deprivation is never being thin.

When you start to feel dizzy and weak, you're almost there

You will be fat if you eat today

There's always a reason to feel not good enough.

Thinspiration

                 "If you really want something you will find a way..

If you don't you will find an excuse"

"Have some respect for yourself, you useless pig"

"Those who skip dinner always end up thinner"

"Don't wish for it, work for it"

"I don't deserve to eat today"

"I_Am_NOT_Hungry"

"The hunger and pain is my stomach getting smaller"

"I only feel pretty when I feel empty"

"cigarette sells would drop overnight if the label said "Warning: contains fat"

"Did you enjoy that moment of freedom, bitch? It will never happen again"

"I hope that binge was worth it, because I am going to put you through hell when it is time to work out again"

"The answer to a new slimmer you, is right beneath your nose...

Stop shoveling food into your mouth, you greedy fuck."

Binge and Purge Tips and Tricks

*I found these on a pro mia blog. They are very useful and different than what you find on most mia blogs*

1. Drink salt water after you binge, it retains all the water and makes it easy to purge afterwards.

2. Drink tons of water while you are eating. It will make the food so much easier to get up, plus it won’t taste bad if there is enough water. it also fills you up faster so you have less to puke out :)

3. Drink a can of diet soda immediately before purging. The bubbles help the food come up. I prefer to drink a can while i am eating, it fills me up so much, then I get this icky feeling in my stomach and go puke, it works great!

4. Push on your stomach.

5. Use your stomach muscles to push the food up.
6. Cough gently while you are gagging (I don’t know why it helps but it does; it seems to “open up” your throat for the food to come up).
7. Gravity is your friend. If it is close enough, try sitting on the edge of your bathtub while you throw up, so your head is lower than your stomach. If the food has to run “downhill” it will obviously be more ready to come up upon gagging. If your tub is not close enough try pulling a stool into the bathroom with you (if there’s no one around to wonder what the hell you’re doing).

8. Food comes back up in basically the same order it went down in. If you eat something brightly colored first, you’ll know when you’ve gotten up mostly all the food. However, since you can’t always get up everything, it’s better to make this “first-food” something low-cal in case you end up having to live with it after all. My favorite is Sugar-Free Jell-O because it is only 10 calories and it is unmistakable when it comes up.

9. Binge after you exercise, this way your metabolism is up and it will burn up the stuff you can’t purge.

10. If throwing up is hard for you use a tooth brush (not the side with the brush) and drink lots of fluids beforehand. 

11. Do not kneel by the toilet. Stand in front of the toilet, tilt your head up and put your fingers down your throat when you begin to gag. Bend down over the toilet and BOOM the food comes up. Much easier and less effort needs to be put into it.

12. After purging don’t brush your teeth!! It just rubs the acid in a eats away at your tooth enamel. Instead rinse your mouth out with water or mouth wash.

13. Throwing up more than one hour after eating is useless. all the calories and fat have been absorbed already

14. Say your going for a shower or bath then when you puke run the water and after have a shower or bath. I also turn my bathroom radio on, gets a little more noise going…

15. If you’re purging in a public toilet, flush the toilet with each puke episode… it covers the sound & you can always say that the toilet isn’t flushing forcefully enough (like it’s broken). 

16.  Instead of rising suspicion by going to the bathroom after every meal, go to your room, turn the stereo up and purge in a garbage can. you’ll get a chance to see how much actually came up and it’ll be easier to hide if you make any noise. 

17. Drink a tall glass of water, do 100 sit ups, then drink more water and so on, until you are as full with water as possible. Do all this as fast as possible, and it’ll come up much easier and less acid.

I have bulimia

Hey guys,
I'm just a 14 year old girl struggling with an eating disorder and before I continue if you have accidentally stumbled across this page and have no connections with eating disorders I advise you to leave now. As i was saying, I do not encourage eating disorders but only wish to help others out there like me. This blog is like my diary and will help me keep on track of my goals. I currently weigh 49.2 kilos and would like to be 40. kilos by the next two weeks. So I'll be ready for school :)
I will not put up with hate towards this page or anyone on it. Any comments which can hurt peoples feelings will be removed.